Days and moments fly by.
And time replaces anything /anyone. Yes, anything can be replaced, so will I.
For all the wrong/right reasons, I chose to take a newer path and end this endless journey of mine.After five long years with the same set of people/atmosphere, well , this is a decision made solely by me & my own self.
Those were unhinged days, heavy silences and endless rants, shared for years with people whose dresses I can recognize on a clothesline, the shape of whose faces and secret fantasies I know intuitively. I know these people blindly and I mean it.
But now, in a sharp zoom out, I see myself standing, my legs a little shaky, eyes wide in uneasiness , in a scene I did not see being set up. It is not ugly, no. It is in fact more alive than anything else. Will miss all those people.
One of the weird things about growing up is this incredible self confidence we acquire. I don’t care about being liked/being admired anymore, at least by people whom I myself don’t like/admire.
I am decluttering myself and moving on.
Declutter not just means to get away from some, but also cultivate deeper relationships with some. New faces, new traits, tiring first impressions… An unthinking revision of personal stories in a bid for fresh intimacies…I board on for a new journey.
Bye Bye.
July 15, 2011
July 08, 2011
Will miss you !
It is a decision by 'ME & MY SELF' to choose to move out .However,I will miss you:(, when I move out from here !
1 . My innovative baking attempts.
2 . The red feathered bird, the little sparrow, the tiny humming bird and ever photo- posing goose.
3. The rabbit which looks around for my calls :) in the dark night.
4. The green lawn that makes me romantic & philosphical alternatively, striking a balance for my self.
5. Respect for time.
6. My Balcony(the most), the breeze, the strong winds.
7. My evening walks to Elmwood Park.
8. Facebook updates ;), dont you know, I choose to be less active bk home.
9. Sub .. veggies... fresh fruits...
10.Icecreams in the middle of the night.
11.Long drives.
12.Kohls.. my weekend outlet.
13.Hershleys Kisses as and when I feel like :P
14.Leisure time to pursue my own interests.God,life of a s/w engr back home is pathetic.
15.Energetic and refreshing get togethers with awesome food ;)
16.Friends made here...
17.And lot of other people too;)
.
.
.
.
Will miss you :(!
1 . My innovative baking attempts.
2 . The red feathered bird, the little sparrow, the tiny humming bird and ever photo- posing goose.
3. The rabbit which looks around for my calls :) in the dark night.
4. The green lawn that makes me romantic & philosphical alternatively, striking a balance for my self.
5. Respect for time.
6. My Balcony(the most), the breeze, the strong winds.
7. My evening walks to Elmwood Park.
8. Facebook updates ;), dont you know, I choose to be less active bk home.
9. Sub .. veggies... fresh fruits...
10.Icecreams in the middle of the night.
11.Long drives.
12.Kohls.. my weekend outlet.
13.Hershleys Kisses as and when I feel like :P
14.Leisure time to pursue my own interests.God,life of a s/w engr back home is pathetic.
15.Energetic and refreshing get togethers with awesome food ;)
16.Friends made here...
17.And lot of other people too;)
.
.
.
.
Will miss you :(!
June 13, 2011
Wed to break !?!
India’s Divorce rates have doubled recently. “The courts are now seeing so many new cases that the government has proposed making divorce easier and faster, in line with other countries. There’s been a 100% increase in divorce rates in the past five years alone." Read in an article.Are we supposed to be happy / proud of this achievement ? WTH !!!
Well , what to say and what not to?Basically, a post like this from an unmarried girl is totally irrelevant to the fact of understanding what goes wrong or what could have been right in the marriage. Still, I couldn’t just take it easily.
First of all ,who coined the words ‘arranged’ marriage and ‘love marriage’ ? I just hate for the very reason of them being in common usage !!!
Come on ! Is not every marriage arranged by people, whether they know each other before or not ? Should not the people getting married have to be ’in love’ after marriage?
Our basic fault is we are not always rightly taught and we go for aeons together with the same wrong lesson.
I was having a casual chat with my American colleague when he said ‘ My country is a disposable country, we dispose people & things if we don’t get along with them. However I am not so happy to say that. My father & grandfather just married once. I always teach my sons/daughters not to be like me. But we are a long way from the days we listened. Now your country is like what we were like in the 70’s. Soon it will become like this.’
Panicky! Such a dreadful plight to our Indian society ! I can’t imagine. Seems only very less people care about the pain and the trend it’s going to leave on us.
‘Take it easy’ attitude is all prevalent now. Actually to say , more in places where it’s not needed and less where it is.
People seem to be applying divorce for silly reasons which could have been ‘Take it easy’,instead they take ‘divorce’ easy.
One prime reason stated is ‘People are getting more individualistic / financially independent’ than ever.What a sorry state! Seems there is no good thing about educating women,if we end up breaking up just because we know we can earn even more than what our husbands can.My Dear sisterhood, do not call this individualism,Grow up ! I do not support male chauvinists neither do I support female activists, who say women can divorce /remarry any num of times to retain her individuality.
Yes, there are very genuine cases when divorce is the only choice.It is even more painful to live under the same roof with a person who you wish you had never met, when the pressure of our society to compulsively live together,and the cries of the hearts to live a better life make everyday an evil occurrence.
Take care,allow yourselves plenty of time.Time always works wonders in relationships. Smartness personified,are people before marriage, irrespective of whether you choose or your parents does for that matter. Set your expectations as minimum as possible.Respect each other's values. Allow the other person to be as he /she is. Well, its not a gyan session.I stop.We are all mature enough,its our responsibility to teach/leave good values to posterity.
Wed to win & not to break !
P.S My prev post on marriage:)
http://ladypearepages.blogspot.com/2007/07/epo-kalyanam-panna-poreenga-unga.html
Well , what to say and what not to?Basically, a post like this from an unmarried girl is totally irrelevant to the fact of understanding what goes wrong or what could have been right in the marriage. Still, I couldn’t just take it easily.
First of all ,who coined the words ‘arranged’ marriage and ‘love marriage’ ? I just hate for the very reason of them being in common usage !!!
Come on ! Is not every marriage arranged by people, whether they know each other before or not ? Should not the people getting married have to be ’in love’ after marriage?
Our basic fault is we are not always rightly taught and we go for aeons together with the same wrong lesson.
I was having a casual chat with my American colleague when he said ‘ My country is a disposable country, we dispose people & things if we don’t get along with them. However I am not so happy to say that. My father & grandfather just married once. I always teach my sons/daughters not to be like me. But we are a long way from the days we listened. Now your country is like what we were like in the 70’s. Soon it will become like this.’
Panicky! Such a dreadful plight to our Indian society ! I can’t imagine. Seems only very less people care about the pain and the trend it’s going to leave on us.
‘Take it easy’ attitude is all prevalent now. Actually to say , more in places where it’s not needed and less where it is.
People seem to be applying divorce for silly reasons which could have been ‘Take it easy’,instead they take ‘divorce’ easy.
One prime reason stated is ‘People are getting more individualistic / financially independent’ than ever.What a sorry state! Seems there is no good thing about educating women,if we end up breaking up just because we know we can earn even more than what our husbands can.My Dear sisterhood, do not call this individualism,Grow up ! I do not support male chauvinists neither do I support female activists, who say women can divorce /remarry any num of times to retain her individuality.
Yes, there are very genuine cases when divorce is the only choice.It is even more painful to live under the same roof with a person who you wish you had never met, when the pressure of our society to compulsively live together,and the cries of the hearts to live a better life make everyday an evil occurrence.
Take care,allow yourselves plenty of time.Time always works wonders in relationships. Smartness personified,are people before marriage, irrespective of whether you choose or your parents does for that matter. Set your expectations as minimum as possible.Respect each other's values. Allow the other person to be as he /she is. Well, its not a gyan session.I stop.We are all mature enough,its our responsibility to teach/leave good values to posterity.
Wed to win & not to break !
P.S My prev post on marriage:)
http://ladypearepages.blogspot.com/2007/07/epo-kalyanam-panna-poreenga-unga.html
May 09, 2011
???
I see him…
His eyes glint ,the derisive smile mocks me.
He seems to walk
With an intelligent aura around,
I ask him who he is ,
The answer ! He laughs out aloud…
I continue to look at him,
With mystery in my eyes.
He seems to overlook my awe
Sometimes, he seems not.
Where does it lie, the truth ?
In the shimmering light
Of his inner eyes?
I take refuge in them
For some time,
I get drowned in the eddy
Of its intensity .
He leaves his
Reflections in me.
I have so much to say him
But I don’t
Words limp
When they look at him.
Who is he ?!?
He doesn’t hear me though;)
April 21, 2011
FB & ME
I am a complete introvert , damn sure!And I can bet on that. There is a cocoon for myself from which I take really longer time to come out and talk to people. My first metamorphosis happened in college, when I had wonderful friends as roommates, who tamed me and taught me to move with people.
Well..further evolution has happened due to Facebook.
It is said , No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up. No matter how fluctuating my mood and temper was, I logged in FB. My mood swings was controlled by some external factor called FB.
It all started when one of my friends said some nice words about FB and I signed up.
There were times when I wrote my status updates on my friend's wall. It was quite a learning and then it was fun.
Unlike Orkut, I did not add everyone who knew me/everyone who sent me a request. Reasons very simple, its quite a pain to follow too many people and dangerous to allow too many people to follow you ;).
Statistics,
Friends :164 Male :61% Female :39%
What do I see here? Does this reflect the decline of ratio of the number of female to male count in our census results ? May /May not be. Whatever, again the female community, atleast in S.India, is not so active in networking.Of these 164,around 70 of them are my collegemates, a few are schoolmates and the rest are from my workplace. I find very few number who dont fall into these categories.
Facebook has been my soulmate all these days , a good companion to kill my boredom.
Sometimes, I posted unruly irrelevant updates straight from the heart. The comments I received really took me to the right spot those times.Sometimes, I have got things done /questions answered.Sometimes, some updates were posted without any motif, however was understood by different people in too many different ways.Many, related the update to the personality of mine which they knew or to any incident involving him/her with me. Well.. Homosapien's brain, One Awesome discovery from HIM.
Unlike Orkut, I need not have to worry about my profile visit flag to be switched off when visiting others's profiles. Even if there is some app which finds out the number of profile visits, I damn care about it. Afterall, I have added people to know their updates :)
In it,again there is a classification. Some are people who posts mind blowing funny comments to others's posts. Some share nice videos /photos. Some share really nice thoughts.I am a huge fan of all these people and make sure that I visit their profiles often;).
FB has also shared lot of my personal space. When my father asked me for some photographs, I asked him to refer Facebook. He was like 'what the heck ?'.And he is yet to know about FB.Both me & him are on the safer side till he signs up. Otherwise,I am sure,he may criticize every post of mine.And also he will spend more time in writing/reading stuff than me and then I doubt he will get food at home:P .
And now, height of all, there are times when some posts made me take crucial decisions which changed/will change my life altogether. Everyone reading this will think I am so crazy if I say, one short film 'Dhruva Natachithram' , has made me decide to go back to my own place/ to my own country. I watched it so many times, ultimately I thought that, to live the life of an alien here, is the worst thing that has happened to me. Now this may be funny,many such decisions are made like this.
Good or bad, Zuckerburg has changed many lives...
I wish I completely scrap this profile , get a new one, where I am just a passive reader of all the status updates and remain mute.
It’s a harder decision and I do not know , when I am going to take that. Sooner , the better, says my mind whereas the fist sized organ refuses to agree.
Sometimes a touch of reticence works nice more than speaking minds to each other ;)
Whatever FB has an unbeaten monopoly in the networking industry ! It will take a few more years for people to come out of its spell, when someone else finds out a better one.
Well..further evolution has happened due to Facebook.
It is said , No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up. No matter how fluctuating my mood and temper was, I logged in FB. My mood swings was controlled by some external factor called FB.
It all started when one of my friends said some nice words about FB and I signed up.
There were times when I wrote my status updates on my friend's wall. It was quite a learning and then it was fun.
Unlike Orkut, I did not add everyone who knew me/everyone who sent me a request. Reasons very simple, its quite a pain to follow too many people and dangerous to allow too many people to follow you ;).
Statistics,
Friends :164 Male :61% Female :39%
What do I see here? Does this reflect the decline of ratio of the number of female to male count in our census results ? May /May not be. Whatever, again the female community, atleast in S.India, is not so active in networking.Of these 164,around 70 of them are my collegemates, a few are schoolmates and the rest are from my workplace. I find very few number who dont fall into these categories.
Facebook has been my soulmate all these days , a good companion to kill my boredom.
Sometimes, I posted unruly irrelevant updates straight from the heart. The comments I received really took me to the right spot those times.Sometimes, I have got things done /questions answered.Sometimes, some updates were posted without any motif, however was understood by different people in too many different ways.Many, related the update to the personality of mine which they knew or to any incident involving him/her with me. Well.. Homosapien's brain, One Awesome discovery from HIM.
Unlike Orkut, I need not have to worry about my profile visit flag to be switched off when visiting others's profiles. Even if there is some app which finds out the number of profile visits, I damn care about it. Afterall, I have added people to know their updates :)
In it,again there is a classification. Some are people who posts mind blowing funny comments to others's posts. Some share nice videos /photos. Some share really nice thoughts.I am a huge fan of all these people and make sure that I visit their profiles often;).
FB has also shared lot of my personal space. When my father asked me for some photographs, I asked him to refer Facebook. He was like 'what the heck ?'.And he is yet to know about FB.Both me & him are on the safer side till he signs up. Otherwise,I am sure,he may criticize every post of mine.And also he will spend more time in writing/reading stuff than me and then I doubt he will get food at home:P .
And now, height of all, there are times when some posts made me take crucial decisions which changed/will change my life altogether. Everyone reading this will think I am so crazy if I say, one short film 'Dhruva Natachithram' , has made me decide to go back to my own place/ to my own country. I watched it so many times, ultimately I thought that, to live the life of an alien here, is the worst thing that has happened to me. Now this may be funny,many such decisions are made like this.
Good or bad, Zuckerburg has changed many lives...
I wish I completely scrap this profile , get a new one, where I am just a passive reader of all the status updates and remain mute.
It’s a harder decision and I do not know , when I am going to take that. Sooner , the better, says my mind whereas the fist sized organ refuses to agree.
Sometimes a touch of reticence works nice more than speaking minds to each other ;)
Whatever FB has an unbeaten monopoly in the networking industry ! It will take a few more years for people to come out of its spell, when someone else finds out a better one.
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