Another Rambling!!

My silence was awkward…. Words when spelt took form only as an outburst of anger…. Who I am angry with? Why am I? Why should I be? Why do external factors pierce my reign? As typical ... Too many questions…

‘Each Chapter of life has to be closed, before a new chapter begins!! ’ Read it in a blog….

I was not taken aback, just shaken.
Sometimes the hardest punches in life take some time to sink in to the pit of your gut, only after which you think of emoting at all. As for that moment, I was just stoic about it….but then... it manifested in my mind …and gave too much thought to it…

Relationships…are they chapters of life? Am I closing each chapter as soon as I finish reading it? If I am … why am I doing so? If I am not, why am I understood to be so? Should I dig the case to find out why it is and why is it not?

While we run around with a heat of hope each day, we fail to pause and attend to few things…which might mean lots to others. Not that we don’t want to…just that we don’t realize that such things can make a difference.

I realized, somebody needs me, despite being me...
They are afraid if I may treat them as chapters of life…
They need my presence in their lives to be shown, whenever I get a chance to do so… So just concluded ‘Take care when it matters…’

If this is the side of the coin which has caught my attention so much…. What about the other side…? Am I expecting something from them too? Am I remembered enough? Am I shown that they love me enough? I really don’t know… But I hardly expect… rather it never happens! But then... I m often charged for forgetting people (which doesn’t actually happen) … Then will not a question arise, when was I remembered and cared for??

Mm…enugh! I have thought too much! Anger rules me… I want to pacify myself! What do I do? Share with someone? Shout at someone? Shout at myself?
No… I write…

Poetry, though it has nearly zero practical use is what makes language beautiful, life less painful.

John F kennedy says!!
"When power leads man towards arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the area of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses."

So am I cleaned now??? I have to be… that’s the better option of life JJJ

Words in silence!

What emerges out of u when u r silent …..
Better than what it does when u speak?
Yep!
When u feel lost …. When u feel Ur silence is listened!
Silence speaks more than wat it does usually!
Thinking hours together for carefully choosing words…
But end up in silent transactions of purity!
Languages seem distant… Memory struggles to create words!
Thoughts run in full speed…..
Without knowing never will it take verbal stability!
Those moments are classy too!
Someone understands Ur silence!

There…u will feel love! :)

Evening

Sun dips as if forever…
Waves rise in excitement!
The large sky spreads out in aesthetic colors!
Moon comes in with unhidden glee!
Birds retreat as nestling calls!
Heart spreads a smile across my face!!

Walking along racing time…
Darkness descends without evening shows!
Only to see our shadows end in the cozy bed!
Thoughts zero down, with emotions unexpressed…
Somewhere half asleep…half lost…
I murmur…Ma… ‘How I would love to see the evening sky’


P.S: My thots betray me… I can barely feel the world around... My cubicle swallows my life!
Am I in the right place?

The above is one confused rambling in the pursuit to find ‘To be or not to be????’

English as a language

It isn’t always easy to convey exclusive ethnic sensibilities in an alien language, however intimate we have become with it.Sixty years after independence ,we are still experimenting, still digging ,still discovering…………..

-- Shreekumar Varma in The Hindu dated 10 Aug2007

What do u feel? Just curious to know!! Post ur views!!

The 52 sec Anthem!

Years later, I heard it..
Tears welled up in my eyes. Muscles stiffened.The short hairs stood erect.
Well.. Hope u could guess what i am talking about.

Are my expressions so tutored? Or! Am I really so emotive when I hear the song?
Be it anything, I felt the immense pleasure of hearing the song after a long time.Long? Why? Working for money in MNC’s ..Never they play the anthem or the tamil thaai vazhthu in any occasion. I couldn’t actually know the reasons why playing such songs in software industry is so restricted? Lets leave aside that.

But why do we indians hesitate to rise up when the national anthem is playing?
I see this attitude( reluctant to rise ) almost everywhere. I have heard in mumbai Cine halls, they play our anthem before the movie begins. But how many of them rise up ? Half the hall sits rooted to their seats with their legs crossed , and munching their pop corn. And some rise, only after embarassed looks at each other.
I don't mean to say that people who don't rise are unpatriotic or that they don't respect the anthem. For that matter, just standing up for the anthem doesn't reflect your patriotism. But it is just a gesture of respect. And I don't think these people mean any disrespect. But then why the hesitation in standing up? Why the embarrassment? Why the sheepish smiles?

Why are we expected to rise for the anthem? It is just like we rise when some senior person enters the room,as a mark of respect. Is it below our dignity to show our respect to our Anthem. ?

In fact, I do rise for the Anthem wherever i am, when it is played in the TV or wherever i hear. That is an involuntary action. But i have been teased by some fellow friends around as though that is an unwanted gesture, and as if i do that to grab attention(cheap teases :( ) .
I never do bother about such comments , because those 52 seconds i forget myself.
I am with my Mother India!


Jai Hind!