The 52 sec Anthem!

Years later, I heard it..
Tears welled up in my eyes. Muscles stiffened.The short hairs stood erect.
Well.. Hope u could guess what i am talking about.

Are my expressions so tutored? Or! Am I really so emotive when I hear the song?
Be it anything, I felt the immense pleasure of hearing the song after a long time.Long? Why? Working for money in MNC’s ..Never they play the anthem or the tamil thaai vazhthu in any occasion. I couldn’t actually know the reasons why playing such songs in software industry is so restricted? Lets leave aside that.

But why do we indians hesitate to rise up when the national anthem is playing?
I see this attitude( reluctant to rise ) almost everywhere. I have heard in mumbai Cine halls, they play our anthem before the movie begins. But how many of them rise up ? Half the hall sits rooted to their seats with their legs crossed , and munching their pop corn. And some rise, only after embarassed looks at each other.
I don't mean to say that people who don't rise are unpatriotic or that they don't respect the anthem. For that matter, just standing up for the anthem doesn't reflect your patriotism. But it is just a gesture of respect. And I don't think these people mean any disrespect. But then why the hesitation in standing up? Why the embarrassment? Why the sheepish smiles?

Why are we expected to rise for the anthem? It is just like we rise when some senior person enters the room,as a mark of respect. Is it below our dignity to show our respect to our Anthem. ?

In fact, I do rise for the Anthem wherever i am, when it is played in the TV or wherever i hear. That is an involuntary action. But i have been teased by some fellow friends around as though that is an unwanted gesture, and as if i do that to grab attention(cheap teases :( ) .
I never do bother about such comments , because those 52 seconds i forget myself.
I am with my Mother India!


Jai Hind!

Writing!

Fiction always has a part of the writer’s heart!
Read it somewhere!!

My heart is revolving around it for so long!!
How true! Only when u experience any emotion, it would come out.

And writing, it means a lot! All thro’ my life, it had been the only receptacle of all my emotions!! Be it happiness or Extreme embarrassment, I never share it with anyone other than my own words.
Might be my words are the best confidant with whom I could both laugh and lament with ease. I love them as my friend, keeper of secrets and a shoulder to cry on. They listen to me as intently as possible... relieving all my pressure from within…

My intention is not to entertain people but to entertain myself primarily….
When I take my own hand after a long back, I relive those moments, enjoy all those happy moments not only when it happens, but when every time I read it again. The tears that roll down without u knowing, when u read your own musings after quite long years, a question arises, ‘R ur words so powerful than ur tears in expressing emotions?’

My letters to God, my letters to my Grandpa… the way I check again and again if I could draft it more lovely. Though my words are simple enough, emotions rule in al those! I love the way each letter is drafted.

God, Gifted are human beings, they have the best tool ever: WORDS!

Cuking funda!

Kitchen!! Boooooooooooooo…………. The most dreadful place where I can never stand alone even for a minute! But my hour’s together chats with my mom do happen there… All these years, I have never learnt anything other than making boost for the uncle’s and aunts who visit suddenly for an evening chat!! Those days when dad enters with parcels in his hand …... the next house aunty grudges, A grown up girl at home… Can’t she do something at least when her mom is sick? Reason very simple….I have never thought of learning cooking..nor I had the intention of cooking… ‘ithu Gun pidikre kai, karandi pidikaathu ' that was the thought which was driving me (out of kitchen)… After 4 years of struggle in the college hostels… managing my breakfast with apples n biscuits, lunch with curd n pappad.. I decided never to stay in hostels at any cost... Stepping into Chennai, one of the cities where I will never ever get the intention of living my life (culture gap, u c), I had to struggle for getting one good meal a day… I decided not to live on apples and biscuits anymore, so pushed my impulse to the kitchen… I had my own fears! But then I encouraged myself, ‘U can make anything, if u are the only consumer of it’ … So that led to all sorts of experiments ….I could well bet my observing skills …I could remember all the steps for almost quite a few recipes my mom makes. I tried my hands with all ingredients I could get. My dishes turned consumable... I tried to get a few scapegoats as well to taste my food… To my surprise, everyone was safe, and they doubted if it was my maiden attempt… Days went on… Cooking is not a big deal…u can learn at any point of time... Of course, invent new dishes too (true, necessity is the mother of invention).. When u are absolutely tired of all the varieties u have in the too many treats (a S/w engr has lot) ….ur hand made curd rice seems to be the best ever dish u had! :) There are times when I am questioned by my fellow mates, the steps and ingredients reg. I had never got an answer for all those coz my style is just mix and match :)... Put what all u have … and u will get the curry … Questioners, plz understand:( There had been some funny times when my ignorance in kitchen deals, is explicitly shown off to the people around... One of my friends, who was keen on tasting the Kathirikkai kozhambu, which was still on the stove, showed me the hand…I poured the extract as though it was some sweet kept in fridge ..Only after hearing the cries, I realized it is hot and it would have burnt the poor hand... And yet another beautiful comment that I could ever forget in my life time … It was to the vegetable curry I had made using some coconut gravy. ‘Epdi iruku?’ ‘ Inipu correcta iruku!’ Wow..that was supposed to be a spicy one. But I got a spicy comment rather. mm..All these are moments when your hidden expertise :) in fields, you never had a formal training.. Come out without much effort… ( ah, much efforts, am I true? Pavam, ppl take much efforts to gulp our preps)!! Also u discover that u have some unexplained relations with Nala in your earlier births! Karandi pidicha kai gun num pidikum !! Wait n C :) Link: Bheemboy’s post –Nalabhaaham!!

Pic Link(google search) :http://kadambam.files.wordpress.com/

Those lovely Sat afternoons!

Saturday, a special day for me! Years Back.....

I was all alone in the family with no sibling to play with...to fight with... for eight years!

My childhood games were limited to the neem tree in front of my house, i will go round n round the tree as if i was chased by someone, only to see my own shadow. And in the evenings ,i used to play nadu pirithal( country dividing:) poor translation! ) ...the effort I make to annex Pakistan, Japan, Europe ( the only countries i had known at that time) to India( u c, I m very patriotic) with all vengeance to take revenge for keeping us as slaves for two hundred years!
I will be representing all the countries, and play such that India alone wins and rest of the countries loses their entire land to India…

Bored of annexing huge land ,I will play fire in the mountain… singing, stopping, everything a single person (of course, me) will do, with different voices …
Sometimes bored of playing alone, I will join with those cricket annas in whom I saw the real passion of becoming a Sachin, when they just fall on the even the rocks to catch the ball (heroism depiction ha ha..)…. And what I do there, I just throw balls for them,for pity sake, they will give me their bats which I could hardly swing like Robin Singh! My play time was limited to 4.30 to 6 sharp. Our pendulum clock will strike six only to see Lady peare inside her house getting ready for daily prayers.( I was so systematic ,u know)! …

Coming to Saturday afternoons….
Dolls and other play things never fascinated me…I had such aversion towards them, I donate all the dolls (sometimes, uncles, aunts show their love for a small child so generously, I get dolls even if I don’t like) to some child in the streets….
Saturday, it was off for dad after lunch (just half a day work)…. I start singing my rhyme from Wednesday, ‘Daddy, Saturday half a day thane? Jolly, we will play’ … Saturday morning will bloom early for me… I wake up and get ready for the Sanivara pooja at home… Though all the time my eyes would be in the gates to see my dad, my lips would be chanting thirupavai… (God I m sorry!) !

After having a healthy diet, dad and me go to our verandah ( we need privacy, u c)... with the chess board and some more boxes ...unda mayakam thondanuku… to get rid of sleep immediately after lunch, we play othaiya retaiya, with the puliyam Muthu ,collected daily, for some months together, when mom prepares rasam. Luck determines the winner, if what you say is correct, u will get the seeds! Dad and I both will be winners alternatively...

And after our minds become fresh to think of strategies to knock the other’s King, we open the chess board, play for hours together... My mom make delicious pakodas or vazhapoo vadas...But never will they disturb our game… we will be so engrossed that we taste those crispy pakodas only after sharing equal victories…. And later, ‘ kathe cheppandi daddy’ episode will start when I hear stories ranging from Ramayana to ambulimama stories….Everyday dad comes with a new story, never repeats anything…and of course with a moral... And till the next saturday, i would like to imitate the hero of the story in many ways:)

Years later,Saturday afternoons turned to be the time for the Fourth empire, we discuss all topics, share views about the editorial pages in the Hindu!! Those were sweet too!!

All Those Saturdays were beautiful!! I miss those days far away from my home! I miss u too dad!! If only i am near u!!

Custom-Thrust upon!!

‘ Epo kalyanam panna poreenga, unga ponnuku?’
I am so allergic to hear this inquiry! Every aunt, every uncle, people whom I meet for the first time who happens to be some distant relative, right away pose this question to my mom and dad.
At times, I feel like hitting them on their face and telling,’ nan epo panna ena?’ but then when I think of the origin of this question, I felt like this needs a lot of scrutiny…

I always feel that marriage should be one’s own choice…but for Indian women, there is no such preference.
It is never an ‘If u are’, rather it is only ‘when u are’ … The large population of Indian women are told that we must get married. Some of them (self included) resist this conception and go along pursuing their careers and live their dreams at least for a short period of time. But then the question persists “when are you getting married?” Some, they just want to put an end to this question, and they succumb.
And a very few have the strength and courage to face the questioning and become ‘that spinster aunty’. But they represent a very small miniscule of the population. They live in metros, have successful careers and have a strong background.
For the others, I should say they are afraid of not being accepted by the community they live in. They are afraid of being spoken by the society. They couldn’t just give ears to repeatedly told mantras, “Can't she see her parents are getting old and they have a duty to do? Whoever heard of a girl who didn't want to marry? Of course, she can study and pursue her career after marriage! “… And in extreme cases, some never let their tongues in, before commenting, I think she had some love failure, and that’s the reason for her resisting marriage’ ….So tired of such filthy talks they accept the lovely boy from…
Are we not clipping the wings of young girls who want to be alone, in the name of culture? Do they necessarily be married against their choice (choice, I mean not choice of groom, but choice if to marry or remain unmarried)…

I don’t say unmarried women achieve a lot, and married ladies just cook, wash iron and have children. We may find girls from both sects who are successful… But point is Marriage should be a mere choice, it should not be thrusted upon….

Thanks to my mom and dad, till now they have not forced me to do anything… and the funny episode is I contribute ideas to my dad how to prevent people from asking about my marriage… And dad implements them too…

And I pray I may not be packed down into the episodes of coaxing, cajoling and ultimately threatening me into submission for fear of keeping up our appearances in the society..….

P.S: This post is not intended to offend anyone or marriage. Just a personal tormented shout……